Full Guide: How To Help A Stressed INTP

Although INTPs are known for being calm individuals, they are not exempt from feeling stressed. INTPs are unlikely to reach out for help, so it’s important to know what frustrates INTPs and how to help a stressed INTP.

You can help a stressed INTP by doing their chores, decluttering their work or living environment, rearranging their busy schedules, limiting their social obligations, not creating social obligations for the near future, and giving them space and the opportunity to enjoy some mental freedom.

Seeing an INTP stressed can be rather disheartening as they are individuals who pride themselves on being self-sufficient and having a good grip on life. Let’s explore the possible things that cause INTPs to feel frustrated and consider ways that you can help a stressed INTP.

9 Things That Frustrate INTPs

INTPs are calm individuals who are patient and rarely get frustrated. However, in exceptional circumstances, INTPs can get frustrated. Here are nine things that cause INTPs to feel frustrated.

1. INTPs Are Frustrated By Strict Schedules

INTPs value their freedom and feel frustrated when they have to abide by a strict schedule. By sticking to rigid schedules, INTPs feel that they cannot give their best effort to every task because they are forced to prioritize time instead of doing everything to the best of their ability. INTPs would much rather do things in their own time to ensure they invest the appropriate amount of time and energy into a task.

2. INTPs Are Frustrated By Highly Emotional Conversations

INTPs do not enjoy being emotional and prefer not to have to engage with others’ emotions. While some INTPs may have high EQ, most INTPs find it challenging to have to express their emotions.

INTPs can become quite frustrated when they engage in highly emotional conversations, especially if they are forced to express their feelings by someone else. Although they may empathize with the other person’s emotions, their understanding does not often translate well, which can make the other person even more emotional.

Overall, INTPs would rather have logical conversations instead of emotional ones. INTPs prefer to show their love rather than verbalize it.

3. INTPs Are Frustrated When They Don’t Have Enough Alone Time

As introverts, INTPs require a significant amount of time by themselves to gain energy. During their alone time, INTPs will reflect on their day, work, life, or the lives of their loved ones. Additionally, INTPs like to spend their free time exploring theories, philosophies, and problem-solving.

INTPs also enjoy using their alone time to enjoy meals by themselves, watch their favorite shows, read, journal, or play video games.

Alone time is crucial for INTPs to feel mentally stimulated but not drained. When an INTP does not have sufficient alone time, it feels as if many tabs are open in their mind. Going without sufficient alone time can be harmful to an INTP. They will begin to feel frustrated, experience mental fatigue, and even become physically ill.

4. INTPs Are Frustrated Engaging In Frivolous Conversations

INTPs value meaningful conversations and love engaging in stimulating discussions that allow them to apply their analytical minds. Therefore, when INTPs are caught in frivolous conversations, they become incredibly frustrated. Frivolous conversations cause INTPs to feel like they are being boxed in mentally and forced to dumb themselves down to engage in meaningless conversations.

5. INTPs Are Frustrated When They Are Unnecessarily Pressurized

INTPs like to take their time to deliberate situations and explore all logical approaches or potential consequences. As bigger-picture individuals, INTPs value having the time to properly consider situations before making a decision, irrespective of whether it is a big or small decision.

Naturally, as logical thinkers, INTPs can discern when something is urgent. Consequently, when people put INTPs under unnecessary pressure, such as creating a deadline far from when the task is due, INTPs become frustrated.

6. INTPs Are Frustrated By Outdated Rules And Traditions

As analytical thinkers, INTPs quickly pick up when existing rules and traditions are outdated and redundant and become frustrated when they have to abide by them.

Due to their logical mindset, INTPs require rules and traditions to hold up to logical scrutiny. While INTPs respect and value traditions, they also value efficiency and do not enjoy doing things that are unnecessary when they could better use their time and energy.

7. INTPs Are Frustrated When They Are Unappreciated

When an INTP does something, they do it to the best of their ability. An INTP will pour everything into doing a task because they take pride in what they do. In this regard, INTPs feel frustrated when they are unappreciated because they feel their efforts are not acknowledged. They feel they wasted their energy doing something when they could have invested their energy elsewhere where their efforts would be appreciated.

8. INTPs Are Frustrated When They Are Not Respected And Valued

As quiet individuals, INTPs can often be viewed as withdrawn, uninterested individuals who do not have much to contribute. Of course, this is not the case at all. INTPs are perceiving situations and take note of things happening so that they make logical contributions rather than being individuals who talk for the sake of talking.

Their introverted nature often leads to people underestimating them, resulting in them being taken for granted. Consequently, when they produce good work, peers consider it rare and fail to acknowledge INTPs as knowledgeable individuals who should be valued for their contributions.

Consequently, INTPs become extraordinarily frustrated when they are not respected and valued because they feel their contributions are overlooked by their personality traits.

9. INTPs Are Frustrated When They Can’t Be Honest

INTPs are honest individuals who value direct feedback. Given that they are not highly emotional individuals, they become quite frustrated when they have to place politeness over truth-telling. Since INTPs struggle to be emotional, they feel they are dishonoring themselves by prioritizing feelings over logic.

How To Help An INTP With Stress

Although INTPs are independent individuals, they often need help but are hesitant to ask for it. Here are seven ways to help a stressed INTP.

1. Give INTPs Mental Freedom When They Are Stressed

INTPs operate best when they have a sense of mental freedom. To an INTP, mental freedom means not having too many things to worry about or being forced to exert mental energy unnecessarily.

If an INTP is stressed, you can directly ask them what’s on their mind. Sometimes, just expressing their frustrations can help them feel less stressed. If they’re not comfortable opening, perhaps purchase a journal for them to encourage them to express their concerns in a private yet healthy manner.

Additionally, INTPs’ mental freedom may be negatively affected when they have to engage in petty arguments, are criticized, or are guilt-tripped. If you are currently experiencing minor frustrations towards an INTP, consider potentially addressing the issue once the INTP is less stressed. However, if your concerns are significant and impact your relationship with the INTP, it may be valuable to address the issue.

If your partner is an INTP and your kids usually run to your partner with their issues, consider informing them that your partner needs some rest and that you are happy to help them with what they need. During the stressful time in your INTP partner’s life, you can hold space for them by alleviating some of their burdens.

2. Help A Stressed INTP With Their Chores

Doing chores is often a draining experience. Unless your INTP is someone who likes to clean when they’re stressed, it may be helpful if you did a few of their chores for them when they’re stressed.

By doing their chores, you are helping them from having to expend their limited energy reserves on chores. While you are helping alleviate their physical responsibility, you are also indirectly helping them mentally.

When an INTP has chores that they have not done, it will bother them and feels like a tab that is open in their mind until the task is completed. Consequently, until the chore has been completed, they will not be able to free their mind from responsibility. In this regard, by doing chores for a stressed INTP, you are helping alleviate a mental burden because now they have one less thing to worry about and can focus on their primary stress-inducing tasks.

3. Help An INTP Rearrange Their Schedule

If an INTP is stressed and has a rigid schedule, sit down with them and brainstorm ways that you can make their schedule suit them better. Discuss which tasks and meetings need to be prioritized and which can be postponed until the INTP is in a better space.

By helping the INTP rearrange their schedule, you are giving them a sense of mental relief because they will feel that they now have more time on their hands, leading them to feel less restricted and consequently less stressed.

4. Avoid Creating Social Obligations For A Stressed INTP

Social settings can be taxing on an INTP on a good day. The fake smiles and small talk takes a lot from an INTP. In particular, social engagements become an extreme nightmare when an INTP is stressed.

Therefore, you can help a stressed INTP by not creating unnecessary social obligations for as long as you foresee the INTP being particularly stressed. For example, if you want to schedule a double date, but your INTP partner is stressed working on a big project due at the month’s end, schedule the double date for the next month.

Additionally, you can limit the time necessary social obligations will occur. For example, if you have planned to have your parents over for a meal, but your INTP partner is under pressure, consider hosting your parents at night and politely asking them to arrive on time and not leave too late. Hopefully, your parents will respect your partner’s needs and understand that while your INTP partner wants to socialize with them, they also need time to focus on themselves.

5. Declutter A Stressed INTPs Space

Dealing with stress while working or living in a cluttered environment can be overwhelming for an INTP. If an INTP is stressed and working or living in a cluttered environment, consider decluttering their work or living space.

However, you must ask the INTP before touching any INTPs belongings. INTPs are very particular individuals. They know where they have put all their things, even if it may look like a disorganized mess to you. So it’s important that you ask precisely what you can do to declutter their environment and how they would prefer you go about doing it.

Once you have the INTP’s approval, you can start to declutter in their space in a manner that pleases them. As they say, your environment represents your mental space. Therefore, by helping an INTP declutter their environment, you are indirectly helping declutter their mind, leaving them with more mental room to deal with their stress.

6. Give A Stressed INTP Space

As introverts, INTPs can feel very overwhelmed by the presence of others, especially if they are already feeling stressed.

INTPs have a lot going on in their heads on a good day. However, their mind is even more cluttered when they’re feeling stressed. One of the best things you can do for a stressed INTP is to give them some space. Sometimes, all a stressed INTP needs is some time to themselves to recharge their introvert batteries.

However, it is crucial that you first ask the INTP whether they need space. Although INTPs do enjoy having space, there are times when what they need most is love, support, and physical affection. By consulting the INTP before you give them space, you ensure that you are not neglecting them when they would like to have you around.

Conclusion

INTPs are often frustrated by strict schedules, highly emotional conversations, frivolous conversations, being under unnecessary pressure, being unappreciated, following unnecessary rules and traditions, being forced to be polite rather than honest, and having insufficient alone time.

You can help a stressed INTP by giving them space and mental freedom, doing their chores, decluttering their environment, rearranging their schedules, and avoiding creating new obligations.

While you can take the initiative and do these things to help a stressed INTP, it’s always valuable to directly ask them how you can help alleviate some of their stress.