Have you or someone you know unintentionally or intentionally hurt an INTJ? Are you worried that INTJ-types hold grudges for never-ending periods of time? Find out if INTJs hold grudges and how they deal with resentment by reading on.
INTJs do not hold grudges. However, this does not mean they forget what was done to them. In the event that you break an INTJ’s trust or harm them, you may find they withhold confidential information or break ties entirely with you. How they react to betrayal is based on logic and not feelings.
Find out how INTJs deal with anger and betrayal by reading on.
Do INTJs Hold Grudges?
Grudges can be taxing. Not only does it negatively affect the grudge-holder, but it also affects the person on the receiving end of it. People who are on the receiving end of grudges can become unnerved and uneasy and might even experience significant amounts of stress as a result.
If the two individuals once had a good relationship, the recipient may wonder what they did to cause the grudge or feel sad about losing a friend who has since become their enemy. All in all, grudges are not only taxing mentally but also physically, as stress and negative emotions affect your physical well-being. In addition, our past experiences can affect our perception of the future.
So, if you have hurt an INTJ, you may be worried that they will hold a grudge against you. After all, many people hold grudges, so what would make the INTJ different? Thankfully, the INTJ is different. The INTJ-type is not prone to holding grudges. INTJs engage with the external world differently from some other personality types.
Instead of using feelings and intuition to engage with the external world, they use logic, facts, and data. This means that they are unlikely to take an offense personally, which means that they will not hold a grudge. However, this does not mean they will sweep transgressions under the rug and forget about them. Every action is carefully recorded in the mind of the INTJ.
And if an offense is committed, you can be sure that it will be permanently recorded. If you harm or break the INTJ’s trust, they will change how they interact with you rather than hold a grudge. Don’t be surprised if the INTJ refuses to trust you with confidential details or limits contact with you (or even completely cuts you off).
Grudges are not behind these actions but rather the logical response to someone who has broken their trust. But be careful, though. Although it is unlike an INTJ to hold a grudge, if pushed enough and repeatedly, INTJ types can unleash their wrath. They are not scared to put aggressors in their place and seek revenge.
However, this option is only reserved for those that the INTJ feels genuinely deserve it. It takes a lot to reach the ‘revenge threshold’ of the INTJ, but once you are there, there is no turning back. If you mess with the bull -however passive it may seem- you will get the horns.
Do INTJs Get Angry?
Due to the INTJs’ tendency not to take offense or hold grudges, you might believe that INTJs do not become angry. This is not true. INTJs do become angry. Do not misinterpret their lack of emotional reactivity as an inability to feel. INTJs feel emotion just like every other personality type. However, they prefer not to show their anger to others.
INTJs tend to suppress their anger or cope with their anger in other ways. One of the most common approaches is to get away from the situation or person that angers them. An INTJ whose fuse has reached the end will become visibly mad and may explode -although this is typically rare for an INTJ.
DO INTJs Get Jealous?
INTJs don’t tend to get jealous in relationships. It is not to say that they don’t feel jealousy -they sure do- but it is just to say that they are not prone to jealousy like some other personality types. The INTJ is not swayed by emotion. When INTJs recognize jealousy, they use their jealousy-antidote, ‘logic,’ to rationalize the jealousy away or find a solution to it.
Thus, if INTJs experience jealousy, they won’t experience it for long. This is especially true for INTJs in relationships. If you want to know how how to tell if an INTJ is jealous, well, you can’t. INTJs will not let you in on their jealousy and will do their best not to show it. Couple the lack of emotional expression with short bouts of jealousy, and it is nearly impossible to tell when an INTJ is jealous.
INTJs don’t just get jealous of people, though. INTJs are prone to getting jealous of things that others have attained –job positions, level of education, body goals, lifestyle assets, etc. In fact, INTJs are more likely to get jealous of other people’s attainments than of people. But this type of jealousy is not the typical jealousy you may picture.
Instead, INTJs use this type of jealousy in a positive light and use it as a motivation tool to better themselves. So, you won’t see INTJs feeling sorry for themselves, but you will find them hustling to get what they want. The way INTJs deal with jealousy is a true testament to not letting emotions get the better of them but instead them bettering themselves.
Conclusion
INTJs are unlikely to take offense or hold grudges. It takes a lot for INTJs to hold grudges. In order for an INTJ to hold a grudge, they must be pushed again and again until they reach their ‘grudge-breaking point.’ Once that threshold has been reached, the INTJ is not scared to fight the aggressor. Also, INTJs are not ones to feel jealousy in relationships often.
The INTJ uses logic to rationalize their feelings. However, INTJs often feel jealous of other people’s attainments. Instead of letting this emotion negatively affect them, they use it as a motivational tool to better themselves.
