Narcissism has become an often-used term in modern pop psychology. Lay people use it to describe vain or self-centered people without looking at the true meaning of narcissism. It is sometimes applied erroneously to people who may be misunderstood by society because they are different. INTJs are a rare personality type, and some people may describe them as narcissists. Is this an accurate description, and can INTJs be true narcissists?
Although INTJs are not emotional people and struggle to deal with others at an emotional level, they are not true narcissists. They have a strong grip on reality, while narcissists rely on fantasy for their self-image. INTJs are loners, and narcissists are dependent on others’ opinions.
INTJ (Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Judging) is one of the rarest personality types. People classified as INTJ personalities make up 2% of the total population. The rarity of this personality type may make them hard for others to understand because they are unusual people. This can lead to them being classed as narcissists.
Are INTJs Narcissists?
INTJs are not narcissists. There are very different characteristics that classify each group. The term narcissist has come to be used very loosely in society without understanding its meaning.
True narcissists are disturbed people who cannot function without manufacturing an alternate reality for themselves. INTJs are people that are fully anchored in reality. Although some traits of INTJs may look slightly similar to narcissism, the two have a widely different foundation.
Do INTJs Have NPD?
Narcissism is a spectrum trait. This means that people can fall anywhere on the spectrum, from low levels to highly dysfunctional narcissistic behavior patterns. The truth is that most people, including INTJs, could at times be classed as showing some narcissistic behavior.
Narcissism at its heart is self-centeredness, and who can claim that they never behave without consideration for themselves. Research has shown that a certain degree of self-centeredness is healthy, giving confidence and ambition.
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a pervasive dysfunctional mental illness that influences every interaction and behavior. People with NPD cannot function normally. There is evidence that people with NPD have decreased brain activity and structures in the area responsible for empathy.
INTJs are not people that fall into the NPD category. They are highly functional people that are happy with their own company. They may not have a wide circle of friends, but they have a small number of people they relate to intimately.
INTJ Vs. Narcissism: What’s The Difference?
Narcissists are characterized by unhealthy patterns of behavior. To understand if INTJs are narcissists, it is helpful to take each characteristic and compare it to the traits of an INTJ.
- Narcissists have an inflated opinion of themselves. Their self-image is based on a fantasy that they have constructed. Often there may be a deep underlying sense of inferiority, but a grandiose sense of self obscures it.
INTJs are often highly gifted people. They are self-confident, but this is based on reality instead of the fantasy seen in NPD. They may battle with low self-esteem if they are not achieving their goals. INTJs will be the first to acknowledge their weaknesses.
- Narcissists are dependent on the praise and affirmation of other people. They actively seek out admiration and have a pathological need for society’s approval. They want recognition and will lie and exaggerate to get it.
INTJ personalities are independent of the approval of others. They are commonly their own harshest critics as they need to see evidence of success. These thinkers judge their achievements, evaluating what could be done better.
INTJs typically are indifferent to admiration and approval unless it is from their close circle of friends and family.
- Narcissists have one-sided relationships. They must be the focus of every relationship. They cannot engage in a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship. Narcissists will manipulate people to ensure that they are the dominant partner in interactions.
INTJ may seem aloof and are often accused of being snobbish. This is largely because they make only a few close friends. They see little value in having wide circles of friends as they find too many interpersonal demands tiring and draining.
They are seldom manipulative. On the contrary, most INTJs are accused of being blunt and sometimes insulting in the way they communicate.
INTJs have a close circle of intimate people with whom they usually have excellent relationships. They are invested in the well-being of these friends, and the relationships are mutually beneficial.
- Narcissists have a sense of entitlement. They believe they deserve special treatment at all times. If they do not receive preferential treatment, they will react with aggression and rage.
INTJs are people that beat their own path. They do not need to have special treatment. Power and status usually have little meaning to INTJs. They see themselves as outsiders and are content in that framework.
- People with NPD believe that other people are envious of them and behave accordingly. They may also be jealous of others with high status and social power.
INTJs are often exceptionally talented people and have little reason to envy anyone. They are solidly seated in realism and would not assume anyone is envious of them.
- One of the most typical traits of narcissists is that they lack empathy. They cannot understand or relate to anyone else’s emotions or viewpoints. This heavily influences their relationships. They are bullies that will threaten, manipulate and exploit anyone in their lives.
Younger INTJs are often accused of lacking empathy, but this is usually the result of being shy or finding many interpersonal relationships exhausting. Mature INTJs have learned to deal better with people. Although empathetic behavior is not natural, they understand that this is a weakness and strive to overcome it.
INTJs exercise empathy with their close friends and family. They can offer support and are willing to assist those they are loyal to.
- Narcissists delight in breaking the rules and social norms, believing they are above these requirements. They enjoy getting away with violating laws. It adds to their sense of power to feel they have outsmarted the system.
INTJs question rules and social norms. They want to know if these rules are effective and helpful. They are more likely to try and change laws if they feel they are detrimental. They will obey good rules and reject those that make no sense.
- Narcissists are typically charming and likable during initial interactions. It is only later that they show their true colors, and people discover too late that they have fallen prey to narcissistic manipulations.
INTJ people are hard to get to know, and they often make a poor first impression because they are aloof. Once people get to know INTJs, they realize they are likable people with strong ethics who like to get things done.
Conclusion
INTJs may occasionally be accused of being self-centered, but no more than other personality types. They are a far cry from narcissists. The underlying basis for INTJs and narcissists are far apart. INTJs are not true narcissists.
